PhenomeMOMS and the True Story Behind MyMommyVents

phenomenal-mothers

October’s PhenomeMOMs have been such an inspiration! From triumphs over the NICU, to dealing with loss, turning pain into purpose, and finding the humor in it all, these extraordinary moms have shown us all what it means to be phenomenal in motherhood.

I was motivated by the PhenomeMOMs and  last week’s PheneomeMOM Valerie harassed convinced me to share my own story. This is the first time I’ve shared it with all the details in such an open space, and a small part of me is terrified. I’ve got butterflies in my stomach, and my heart is beating really fast right now… but I knew I’d have to share this one day. I’m hoping that as I share my story–openly and honestly– you’ll understand why I felt such a strong desire to start Mymommyvents.

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I’ve always been kind of a Type A personality. I always have a detailed plan, with deadlines and notes and highlighted portions…I’ve been told that I’m super organized and I show grace under pressure. The birth of my first son would change all of that.

My son was born on May 10th, a full month before his due date. Goodbye, detailed plan. It had been a pretty easy pregnancy, with no morning sickness or crazy cravings at 3am (although I was a fiend for bread. Did you know you Red Lobster does takeout? You can get a bag of biscuits at the little window. Not that I did that or anything. I didn’t eat a bag of biscuits by myself, either). My biggest problem was managing my gestational diabetes, and the fact that I had recently left a temp job, leaving us dependent on DaddyVents’ income.

My mother went with me to a routine doctor’s appointment for a stress test. Because of the diabetes, I had to see my regular obstetrician as well as the hospital perinatologist on alternating weeks each month. My husband was at work, but I had plans to meet him and my mother in law later that day to pick out the bedding for the baby’s crib. We’d spent the weekend walking around Franklin Mills mall in Philly, and my mom and I had gone to National Mom’s Night Out at Roosevelt Field on Thursday evening. I felt great, and was excited to start putting my baby’s nursery together.

The technician pulled my chart from the machine and looked at me strangely. “Do you feel anything?” she asked. I was used to little man dancing around, but nothing felt out of the ordinary. “You’re having contractions.” I laughed. Yeah, right. This is what the women on TV were screaming about? She told me that every time I had a contraction, the baby’s heart rate dropped. They wanted me to go to the hospital so they could monitor his progress. I called DaddyVents to let him know that I was being sent to the hospital, but that he didn’t have to leave work or anything, because I felt totally fine.

Of course, he ignored me and got to the hospital in record time. The nurses and midwives at the hooked me up to a fetal monitor. “Did you feel that?” a nurse questioned. “Feel what?”I said. “You just had a huge contraction.” Seriously?

I honestly hadn’t felt a thing. I was ready to go home and sleep, but the midwife let me know that not only was I not going home, I was 4 centimeters dilated. I immediately began to cry. What about my plan? We didn’t even have a car seat! Our baby shower was supposed to be that Saturday. I was more worried about where he would sleep than labor. My husband calmed me down, and we were moved into a delivery room.

I tried to keep my spirits up. We watched television, and one of our dearest friends, who’s also a doula (and Moms Rising associate), came to visit and coach me through the night. Hours later, and still no baby. My OB wanted to start Pitocin in order to speed up my labor, but I refused. I assured him that my son would make his appearance soon and that I was afraid of needles, so I didn’t want an epidural, either. I started to feel the contractions a few hours later.

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Want to know what happened next? Click here for Part 2 of my birth story.

Tiffani
Find me here

Tiffani

Tiffani is the wife and mom behind MyMommyVents, co-creator of The Mommy Conference, and co-founder of the digital collective Sisterhued. Her writing and parenting tips have been seen on The Washington Post, Mommy Noire, Yahoo Parenting, and Fit Pregnancy.
Tiffani
Find me here

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18 Comments

  1. October 27, 2014 / 5:30 pm

    I can’t wait to read the rest of the story! We all have a story to tell and I would have never known yours. Thank you for being brave enough to share!

    • tiffani
      October 27, 2014 / 7:05 pm

      Thanks for reading, Ashley! The rest of the story will definitely take bravery for me to share.

    • tiffani
      October 27, 2014 / 7:06 pm

      Thanks Nae! I was so excited when I read that you’d had a baby. I used to read your blog from way back.

  2. October 27, 2014 / 6:00 pm

    Thanks for sharing! I can’t wait to read the rest. You are one brave momma for sharing your story.

    • tiffani
      October 27, 2014 / 7:08 pm

      Thanks for reading, Elisa! It’s been almost four years,but this is really the first time ive talked about it in a public space.

  3. October 27, 2014 / 6:15 pm

    Oh Tiffani, talk about a cliffhanger!
    So glad you decided to share your story. Can’t wait for the rest but I know this part is already a blessing to any mom whose birth plan didn’t go the way the expected.
    See you Wednesday 🙂

    • tiffani
      October 27, 2014 / 7:09 pm

      Thanks MJ! Glad to know you’ll be back to read the rest!

    • tiffani
      October 27, 2014 / 7:59 pm

      Mrs.TDJ! I’m so honored that you took the time to read (and comment!). I read your blog for a while from Monnie’s blog roll,but then I lost track of you. So glad to connect with you again, and thank you for stopping by.

  4. Shavon
    October 27, 2014 / 9:14 pm

    Thanks for sharing. I can’t wait to read the rest of your story. I also had gestational diabetes, the hospital visits every week were exhausting and they were sure my son would be about 10 lbs. Luckily he was only eight but I did end up havinga cc-section.

    • tiffani
      October 27, 2014 / 9:41 pm

      Thanks for reading, Shavon! They swore they were going to induce me at 38 weeks. He didn’t wait that long, lol.

  5. October 27, 2014 / 10:12 pm

    Great first part to the story! Can’t wait for part 2!

    • tiffani
      October 28, 2014 / 12:59 am

      Thanks Nellie!

  6. Mel
    October 29, 2014 / 12:45 pm

    It surely does not work out as we plan. Not for everyone anyway…both my girls were 4 weeks early. Thanks for sharing. My story was just as scary for my youngest daughter. Pregnancy eh.. lol

    • tiffani
      October 29, 2014 / 1:56 pm

      Wow Mel, both of them? They day we made plans abd God laughs. Part 2 of my story is even scarier.

  7. October 29, 2014 / 4:37 pm

    It never works out as we plan. Babies come when they’re ready. Our daughter was 1 week late. I was induced.

  8. Jocelyn
    November 7, 2014 / 2:26 am

    Finally dropping by again. Talk about the saying “We make plans and God laughs…” I like the cliffhanger… 😉

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