For some women, the transition to motherhood is easy. They jump into breastfeeding without a hitch, can change a diaper in less than a minute, and even manage to wear something other than yoga pants. For others, the middle of night feedings and lack of showers can be a challenge.
So, how long does it take the average mom to adapt to her new role?
Almost five months.
A 2012 study conducted by the Munchkin baby brand found that it takes exactly four months and 23 days for women to adjust to new motherhood. “After nearly five months, new mothers bounce back as they have a routine nailed down having found the confidence to be able to deal with every eventuality thrown at them,” says a Daily Mail report. After the first few months, we’ve learned exactly how many diapers we’ll need for a day out, have stopped freaking out over fevers less than 100.4, and are finally getting some rest at night.
Motherhood can be a whirlwind, and it’s easy to get caught up, especially in the beginning. Munchkin spokeswoman Claire Rayner says becoming a first time mom ‘leads to a flurry of mixed emotions and it can naturally be completely overwhelming.” In fact, two thirds of the women surveyed said that the worry and exhaustion of being a new parent led them to tears, and 6 out of 10 worried that they just weren’t capable of being a mom.
We’ve all been there. Sobbing uncontrollably in the shower, so sure that we’re messing up. We aren’t alone though. One fifth of the mothers surveyed didn’t talk to anyone about what they were feeling because they didn’t want to be thought of as failing or struggling. After my son was born, I felt like I didn’t have anyone who I could talk to. Short conversations with my best friend weren’t enough, and I knew I couldn’t be the only new mom feeling that way. I started MyMommyVents as a way to connect with other moms who were experiencing the same mix of feelings–happy, scared, tired,overwhelmed and alone. The private facebook group grew as my friends started adding their friends, and online connections turned into true friendships.
If you’re feeling like you just haven’t gotten the swing of things yet, that motherhood is just too hard–feel free to talk here. And hang in here. By four months and 24 days, you’ll be a pro.
How long do you feel it took/will take for you?
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I feel like it took me forever to get back in the groove after my first child. The second one I don’t think I missed a beat because I knew what to expect and I was in a good place.
I tell moms all the time to try and relax, I feel like I missed so much of my son as a baby because I was worried about everything that I don’t know if I enjoyed him as a baby. I really took advantage of my expertise the 2nd time around. I’m just thankful I got another chance to experience having a baby in a less stressful mindstate.
Mimi, I totally agree. The first year with my oldest went by in a blur. I was so worried about doing everything “right,” and would lie and tell people that I was fine. I learned to slow down and take one day at time the second time around.