The official Google definition of FOMO is the anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, often aroused by posts seen on a social media website.
When we scroll through the ‘gram, envious of the highlights of someone else’s party, vacation, holiday–that’s FOMO. We sit there wondering what we missed, and if the experience is as awesome as it looks in pictures.
That’s how I felt about The Momference.
I watched as ultra cool bloggers like Mimi Cutelips and Baby Shopaholic announced that they’d be panelists. I saw the pictures in front of the purple balloon wall. I watched as a sea of black and brown moms danced to 90’s hits and repeated affirmations.
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I felt the FOMO hard, and I knew that I absolutely had to be in the room for the next one.
For the last two years, The Momference has taken the nation’s capital by storm. It’s the “premiere, one-day conference for motivated, magical moms of color; boasting regionally and nationally acclaimed mom influencers, panels, celebrity keynotes, workshops, vendors and top-tier, multi-cultural focused products.”
The vision of PR powerhouses and moms Nikki Osei-Barrett and Simona Noce Wright, the event brings moms of color together to uplift, support, and inspire one another. Produced entirely by a #MomSquad of 27 women, The Momference is an epic celebration of melanated motherhood.
This year’s Momference featured keynotes from a star studded roster of moms, including actresses Khadeen Ellis and Tatyana Ali, and celebrity cosmetic dentist Dr. Amira Ogunleye; and a special chat with Therapy for Black Girls Founder, Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, PhD .
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I booked a seat on the 5pam Megabus and headed to Washington DC for a full day of inspiration.
After checking in with the Renaissance’s friendly front desk staff, I headed upstairs. I haven’t been alone in a hotel room in years, and was really excited to spread out in the middle of the king size bed–but guess what? I ended up in the exact same spot I do at home. I didn’t even touch the pillows on the other side.
I blasted the new DJ Khaled album while I got ready the next morning, and was seated at a table of friendly faces once a member of the #MomSquad realized I was attending the Momference by myself. Most of the moms came with a friend or two, but I met a few ladies who decided to come solo after receiving a personal phone call from the #MomSquad. That’s one of the things that makes the Momference stand out–they CALL you to see if you’ve got questions. Like, on the phone.
The Momference kicked off with Simona and Nikki entering the ballroom to the sounds of Beyonce’s Homecoming…and Baby Shark. Mom life, right? Simona is mommy to three, and Nikki literally just added a baby girl to her crew, so they know a thing or two about toddler jams.
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After a live session of BlackLove.com’s Moms With Coffee, we split into two Momference Master Classes: Mommy In the Streets and Mommy Between the Sheets. Each session was designed to show mamas how to get their glow back, from the boardroom to the bedroom.
After an informative panel, moms were invited to Give, Grow, and Glow with three different Momference experiences. I chose the Glow track, focusing on mental and physical health. I learned about managing motherhood through infertility, childbirth, endometriosis, and postpartum depression; how to make self-care work, how nutrition affects mental health, and even picked up a few tips to find my C.A.L.M. in the midst of chaos from Therapy for Black Girls’ founder, Dr. Joy.
I made my own blend of shea butter with oils with Zen in A Jar, munched on sweets from a donut wall; and shopped at the Mommy Market, a curated selection of black-owned, mom-owned, and women-owned businesses.
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Although I loved all of the head wraps, hosiery, and decadent treats for moms, I didn’t overspend, and only walked out with four books–for the boys.
Even though it’s been over a week since The Momference wrapped, moms are still posting, with pics of downward dogs from Sunday’s trap yoga session and videos of how they’re using their swag. And please believe, there was some serious swag.
We walked into the main ballroom to see tables covered with huge jute totes bearing The Momference logo and cards at each seat. My bag was heavy with full sized products from EDEN Body Works, Curls, Mielle Organics and Dove; Hot Mama lipstick from The Lip Bar, feminine products from Femly Box, and even a cool pair of glasses from Zenni Optical.
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As we dug into our goodies, moms were recognized for their work in the community with surprise awards. We were inspired by the stories of moms like Kassandra Johnson, who battled a brain tumor shortly after giving birth to her daughter; and Ariel Joy, who created a t-shirt company to raise money and awareness of the Flint water crisis. None of the moms had any idea that they were being honored, so their reactions were real and raw as the room of 500 women cheered and celebrated them.
But the most beautiful part of the day wasn’t the awards or the huge gift bag. It wasn’t the donut wall, or the complimentary massages, or the room of dope women dressed to impress. It wasn’t even belting out “Knuck If You Buck” lyrics and swag surfing with my new mom friends at the super lit after party in the hotel lobby–although that was pretty fun.
The most touching part of The Momference was exchanging hope and love with other mamas. The blank cards placed in front of each seat were used for us to jot down an encouraging message for someone else. As we left the ballroom, we handed cards in hues of blue, pink, yellow and purple to moms we didn’t know or had never met.
I thought about how I felt after the birth of my first son. I thought about how life changes once you make the leap from me, to we. I thought about all the nights I laid awake, wondering if I was doing it right. If I was a good mom.
And I poured my heart onto the page.
The Momference was so much more than just a really dope gathering of moms. It was a chance to be uplifted, supported and embraced. It was a magical, melanated celebration of motherhood–and I’ll definitely be back next year.
If FOMO is kicking in, don’t miss the next Momference on May 16th, 2020. Find more information here.
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